Title: New Release Tuesday
Featuring: Malak Garland
Date: 9/22/2020
Location: New Orleans, Louisiana

The anticipation was killing him. It was a dreary, overcast day in New Orleans, Louisiana as Malak Garland stood amongst the masses, outside a big box electronics retailer in anticipation for quite possibly the biggest video game release in a very long time.

“I can’t wait to get home and play it,” A random voice was heard from down the line.

BLIP! A notification on Malak’s phone suddenly went off. He glanced down at it, in his sweaty palm and the screen read, ‘NOTIFICATION - NEW MESSAGE FROM C. FUSE.’

“I can’t be bothered with this right now,” Malak muttered to himself.

Malak desperately needed this. He needed to keep his focus. He had been feeling down since Toybox, Stevens Dynasty and Lucky Sevens, who had just become the new number one contenders for his Tag Team Titles, were all breathing down his neck to various degrees. He needed a pick-me-up, a distraction from all the heat he had garnered from reaching the pinnacle of DEFIANCE tag team wrestling.

“I hear you can even customize your character!” Another person spoke from a different area of the line.

Malak just stood there, by himself, waiting. Waiting for his shining moment to finally enter the store and retrieve what was rightfully his. He didn’t pre-order the game. He didn’t need to. He knew he was getting a copy. He had a spot in line, after all.

“The store is opening!” An excited kid screamed from miles back.

Indeed, the doors to Great Purchase swung open. It was an iconic yellow and blue building that every nerd scurried to for their electronic needs. However, the line moved slower than lunch time at a prison. Anxiety rose inside Malak. He griped his debit card tightly. He wasn’t allowed to have a credit card yet because he was deemed high risk, so he settled for a debit card instead. Cash, the way it should be.

“Gotta get it, gotta get, gotta get it,” He repeated to himself in a manic state.

He finally entered the store. He weaved around people as if he was a ninja on a stealthy quest. He arrived at the already ravaged video game section. The clerk beside the standees was clearly rattled as they belligerently blurted into their headset device.

“I need back-up at the games section! I repeat, back-up at the games section!” The clerk pleaded.

Malak avoided the crowd and consulted the clerk immediately.

“Excuse me, I’m looking for MY copy of Gooberkins: Muncher Gremlins Attack 2099 for Switch. Do you have it?” Malak asked hastily.

The eyes of the clerk lurked over to the hoard of people literally tearing the display to shreds. The clerk simply pointed.

“I-it’s there. Or, well, it looks like it’s all gone. Yup, we’re out of copies, sir,” The clerk stuttered nervously.

Malak stood there. He stared a hole right through the clerk, not even bothering to look at the crowd of people dispersing to the pay station.

“What?” Malak asked with intensity.

The clerk wiped some sweat from their brow.

“We’re all out, sir. I’m really sorry but as you can see, this is an extremely popular game and it sold out in mere seconds!” The clerk explained.

Malak was having none of it.

“Unacceptable. I am here. I want Gooberkins: Muncher Gremlins Attack 2099 for Switch. Do you have any idea what I’ve been going through recently? You don’t seem to understand. This one has the secret Muncher Gremlins in the game. It’s only the most anticipated video game in history. I WANT MY MUNCHER GREMLINS!” Malak amped up.

The clerk ran away as they just couldn’t handle the volatility of the situation. Malak stood there, confused as ever. He showed up. Why shouldn’t he be able to get a copy of the game? It was his RIGHT after all. He deserved the distraction from the immense amount of pressure he was currently under from work.

“What the absolute... this can’t be right,” He self-talks, “I want my Muncher Gremlins. IT IS MY RIGHT! I WANT MY (EXPLETIVE) MUNCHER GREMLINS!”

His yell caught the attention of everyone in the surrounding area. They stopped to look at Malak for a moment before continuing to sprint to the cashier. No one cared. Everyone just cared that they got the game for themselves and themselves only. No one else mattered. Besides, it was Malak who was selfish for thinking he could just saunter into Great Purchase, without a copy on reserve or pre-order, and just get handed the most sought-after game in modern history.


Another notification went off on his phone. He checked it and noticed how the price of the game instantaneously skyrocketed to unreasonably high levels on secondary market websites. His eyes couldn’t believe it. Tears began to fall down his face and familiar ones at that. Malak walked out of the store, destroyed.

“Muncher. Gremlins. Mine,” He said with delusion.

His stare locked onto a father and son in the parking lot who were high-fiving one another with game in hand.

“Must be nice,” he thought.

They could just go home and have endless hours of fun and entertainment with the game of the century while Malak was left with nothing. A scowl of sour milk proportions overcame his face. For this day, the only Muncher Gremlins Malak would end up playing with were the ones in his head.

More Propaganda | View Malak Garland's Biography



"Oscar… are we still good guys? Can I just rip his arm off and beat him with it right now?"

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